Chapter 5

(Enter HANNO, followed at a distance by his SERVANTS.)

HANNO: (to himself.) Hyth alonim vualonuth sicorathi si ma com sith, Chi mach chumyth mumys tyal mictibariim ischi, Lipho canet luth bynuthi ad aedin bynuthii. Birnarob syllo homalonin uby misyrthoho Bythym mothym noctothii velech Antidasmachon.

Yssidele berim thyfel yth chylys chon, tern, lyphul Uth bynim ysdibut thinno cuth ru Agorastocles Ythe manet ihy chyrsae lycoch sith naso Byuni id chil luhili gerbylim lasibit thym Bodyalyth herayn nyn nuys lym moncoth lusim.

[Exalonim volanus succuratim mistim Atticum esse Concubitum a bello cutim beant lalacant chona Enus es huiec silec panesse Athidamascon Alem induberte felono buthume Celtum comucro lueni, at enim avoso uber Bent hyach Aristoclem et se te aneche nasoctelia Elicos alemus [in] duberter mi comps vespiti Aodeanee lictor bodes jussum limnicolus.]

(Enter AGORASTOCLES, from his house, followed by MILPHIO.)

AGORASTOCLES: (in a loud voice.) Do you say, Milphio, that Syncerastus told you that both of these women were freeborn, and stolen away from Carthage?

MILPHIO: I do say so; and if you were willing to act wisely, you’d at once assert their liberty by an action on their freedom.

For it’s a disgrace to you for you to allow your own country-people to be slaves before your eyes, who were free women at home.

HANNO: (overhearing, apart.) O ye immortal Gods, I do entreat your aid! What speech is this that my ears devour! Surely the words of these persons are made of chalk;

how have they cleansed away all the dark spots of woe from me!

AGORASTOCLES: If you’ve got witnesses of this matter, I’ll do as you bid me.

MILPHIO: Why speak you to me about witnesses? Why don’t you stoutly insist upon it? Some way or other, Fortune will be your assistant.

AGORASTOCLES: It’s much more easy to begin a thing than to bring it about.

MILPHIO: (catching sight of HANNO, attended by his SERVANTS.) But what bird is this, pray, that’s coming hither with the tunic on? Is he from the baths, I wonder, enveloped in his cloak?

I’ faith, the countenance is surely Carthaginian.

The man’s a Gugga. I’ faith, he certainly has got some ancient and antiquated servants.

AGORASTOCLES: How do you know?

MILPHIO: Don’t you see the fellows following, loaded with luggage?

And, as I fancy, they’ve got no fingers on their hands.

AGORASTOCLES: Why so?

MILPHIO: Why, because they go with their rings in their ears.

I’ll approach them, and address them in the Punic language: if they answer, I’ll continue to speak in the Punic tongue if not, then I’ll adapt my language to their usage.

How say you, do you still remember anything of the Punic language?

AGORASTOCLES: Nothing at all, i’ faith; for tell me, how could I know, who was but six years old when I was stolen away from Carthage?

HANNO: (apart.) O ye immortal Gods! very many freeborn children have been lost from Carthage after this manner.

MILPHIO: How say you?

AGORASTOCLES: What do you want?

MILPHIO: Should you like me to address this person in the Punic tongue?

AGORASTOCLES: Do you understand it?

MILPHIO: No Punic man this day is a better Punic than I.

AGORASTOCLES: Go and address him, as to what he wants, why he’s come, who he is, of what country, and whence he comes. Don’t be sparing of your questions.

MILPHIO: (addressing HANNO and his SERVANTS.) Avo! Of what country are you, or from what city?

HANNO: Hanno Muthumballe bachaëdreanech.

AGORASTOCLES: What does he say?

MILPHIO: He says that he is Hanno from Carthage, a Carthaginian, son of Muthumbal.

HANNO: Avo!

MILPHIO: He salutes us.

HANNO: Donni.

MILPHIO: He intends to present you with some donation out of this; what, I don’t know. Don’t you hear him promise?

AGORASTOCLES: Salute him again in Punic, in my name.

MILPHIO: (to HANNO.) Avo donni he tells me to say to you in his name. (Pointing to AGORASTOCLES.)

HANNO: Mehar bocca!

MILPHIO: Be that for yourself rather than me!

AGORASTOCLES: What does he say?

MILPHIO: He declares that his box for his teeth is painful. Perhaps he takes us to be doctors.

AGORASTOCLES: If it is so, tell him that we are not; I don’t wish a stranger to be mistaken.

MILPHIO: (to HANNO.) Hear you.

Rufen nuco istam.

AGORASTOCLES: This is my wish, that in fact everything should be explained to him just as it is. Ask him whether he has need of anything.

MILPHIO: (to HANNO.) You who have got no girdle, why have you come to this city, or what is it you seek?

HANNO: Muphursa.

AGORASTOCLES: What is it he says?

HANNO: Moin lechianna.

AGORASTOCLES: Why has he come?

MILPHIO: Don’t you hear? He declares that he is wishful to give African mice to the Aediles as a show at the games.

HANNO: Lalech lachananim liminichot.

AGORASTOCLES: What does he say now?

MILPHIO: He says he has brought latchets, water-channels, and nuts;

he’s now begging that you’ll lend him your assistance in having them sold.

AGORASTOCLES: He is a merchant, I suppose?

HANNO: Is amar binam.

AGORASTOCLES: What is it he says?

HANNO: Palum erga dectha.

AGORASTOCLES: Milphio, what is he saying now?

MILPHIO: He says that he has got spades and forks given him for sale, for digging the garden and reaping the corn.

AGORASTOCLES: What is that to me?

MILPHIO: He wishes you to be informed of it, so that you mayn’t suppose that he has taken anything secretly and by stealth. He has really, I do believe, been sent here to your harvesting.

HANNO: Muphonium sucoraim.

MILPHIO: So there! do take care, please, how you do what he’s begging of you.

AGORASTOCLES: What is he saying, or what is he begging? Explain it.

MILPHIO: For you to order him to be placed beneath a hurdle, and for many stones to be heaped upon it, so as to put him to death.

HANNO: Gunebel balsamen ierasan!

AGORASTOCLES: Tell me what it is that he’s saying.

MILPHIO: I’ faith, now I really don’t at all know.

HANNO: (speaking in their own language.) But that you may know, now from this moment henceforth will I speak Latin.

(To MILPHIO.) Upon my faith, you must be a worthless and bad servant, to be laughing at a person, a foreigner and a stranger.

MILPHIO: But, i’ faith, at yourself a person that’s both a swindler and a cheat, who have come here to take us in, you half-and-half Lybian, you double-tongue, just like a crawling reptile.

AGORASTOCLES: (to MILPHIO.) Away hence with your abusiveness! do restrain your tongue. You’ll keep it from uttering abuse, if you are prudent; I don’t want you to be speaking harshly to my kinsmen. I was born at Carthage; do you remember that.

HANNO: O my fellow-countryman, greetings to you!

AGORASTOCLES: And you, troth, whoever you are;

and if you have need of anything, pray mention it, and command me for the sake of our common country.

HANNO: I return you thanks; but I’ve got a place of entertainment here; I’m in search of the son of Antidamas; do point me out Agorastocles, if you know him. Do you know any young man here named Agorastocles?

AGORASTOCLES: If, indeed, you are in search of the adopted son of Antidamas, I am the very person whom you are in search of.

HANNO: (starting.) Hah! what’s that I hear?

AGORASTOCLES: That I am the son of Antidamas.

HANNO: If so it is, if you would like to compare the token of hospitality, see here, I’ve brought it. (Shows him the ticket.)

AGORASTOCLES: Come then, show it here. (He takes it in his hand, and looks at it.) It is exactly true; for I’ve got the counterpart at home.

HANNO: O my host, hail to you right earnestly; for it was your father, then, Antidamas, that was my own and my father’s guest; this was my token of hospitality with him.

AGORASTOCLES: Then here at my house shall hospitality be shown you; for I don’t reject either Hospitality or Carthage, from which I sprang.

HANNO: May the Gods grant you all you may desire. How say you? How could it happen that you were born at Carthage, but had a father of Aetolia here?

AGORASTOCLES: I was stolen away from there; this Antidamas, your guest, bought me, and adopted me as his son.

HANNO: He himself, likewise, was adopted by Demarchus, But about him I say no more, and return to you. Tell me, do you at all remember the names of your parents?

AGORASTOCLES: I remember my father and my mother’s name.

HANNO: Repeat them, then, to me, to see if I know them, perchance, or if they are relatives of mine.

AGORASTOCLES: Ampsigura was my mother, and Iachon my father.

HANNO: I could wish that your father and mother were alive.

AGORASTOCLES: Are they dead?

HANNO: So it is, a thing which I bore with much grief; for your mother Ampsigura was my cousin-german; your father—he was my uncle’s son, and when he died he made me his heir; of whom being deprived by death, I am greatly affected. But if it is the fact that you really are the son of Sachon, there ought to be a mark upon your left hand, a bite which an ape gave you when a child, playing with it.

Show it, that I may look at it;

open your hand.

AGORASTOCLES: (opening his hand.) Look, if you like; see, there it is.

My kinsman, welcome to you!

HANNO: And welcome to you, Agorastocles! I seem to myself to be born again, in having found you.

MILPHIO: By my troth, I’m delighted that this matter has fallen out so happily for you. (To HANNO.) And would you decline to take advice?

HANNO: Really, I should wish to be advised.

MILPHIO: His father’s property ought to be restored to the son; it’s fair that he should have the property which his father possessed.

HANNO: I wish no otherwise; everything shall be restored. I’ll give his own property to him all safe, when he comes there.

MILPHIO: Take care and restore it, will you, even though he should live here still.

HANNO: Nay but, he shall have my own as well, if anything should happen to me.

MILPHIO: A pleasant project has just now come into my mind,

HANNO: What’s that?

MILPHIO: There’s need of your assistance.

HANNO: Tell me what you wish. Really, you shall have my services just as you please. What is the business?

MILPHIO: Can you act the cheat?

HANNO: Towards an enemy, I can; to a friend, it would be mere folly.

MILPHIO: I’ faith, it is an enemy of his. (Pointing at AGORASTOCLES.)

HANNO: I could do him a mischief with pleasure.

MILPHIO: He’s in love with a person who belongs to a Procurer.

HANNO: I deem that he acts discreetly.

MILPHIO: This Procurer lives close at hand.

HANNO: I could do him a mischief with pleasure.

MILPHIO: He has two slave girls, courtesans, sisters; one of these he is desperately in love with, nor has he ever taker any liberties with her.

HANNO: It’s an unhappy kind of passion.

MILPHIO: The Procurer plays upon him.

HANNO: He’s enhancing his own profits thereby.

MILPHIO: He wishes to do him an evil turn.

HANNO: He’s right, if he does do it.

MILPHIO: Now I adopt this plan, and prepare this contrivance, that we should cite you; you are to affirm that they are your daughters, and that they were stolen when little from Carthage, and to maintain the cause of both in an action on their freedom, as though they were both your own daughters. Do you understand?

HANNO: On my faith, I do understand; for I likewise did have two daughters who were stolen away when little children, together with their nurse.

MILPHIO: Upon my word, you do feign it cleverly. At the very commencement this amuses me.

HANNO: (aside, weeping.) Much more, i’ troth, than I could wish.

MILPHIO: (aside to AGORASTOCLES.) Dear me! a subtle person, upon my word, artful and knowing, both tricky and crafty! How he does whimper, in order that with his gestures he may effect this all the more easily.

Even myself, now, the master-workman, does he excel in skill.

HANNO: But their nurse, of what appearance was she? Tell me.

MILPHIO: Of stature not tall, of a dusky complexion.

HANNO: ’Tis the very person.

MILPHIO: Of agreable form, with a small mouth, and very dark eyes.

HANNO: I’ faith, you really have depicted her form exactly in your words.

MILPHIO: Should you like to see her?

HANNO: I’d rather see my daughters. Still, go and call her out of doors. If they are my daughters, if she is their nurse, she’ll recognize me at once.

MILPHIO: (knocking at the door of the PROCURER’S house.) Hallo there! is there any one here? Tell Giddeneme to come out of doors; there’s a person wants to see her.

(Enter GIDDENEME and a BOY, from the house.)

GIDDENEME: Who is it that knocks?

MILPHIO: One that’s a near acquaintance of yours.

GIDDENEME: What do you want?

MILPHIO: Come now (pointing to HANNO.) do you know that person in the tunic, who it is?

GIDDENEME: Why, whom do I behold? O supreme Jupiter! this sure is my master, the father of my foster-children, Hanno, the Carthaginian!

MILPHIO: Now, do see the cunning hussey this Carthaginian is really a clever juggler; he has brought all over to his own opinion.

GIDDENEME: (running up to HANNO.) O my master! welcome to you, Hanno! most unhoped for by myself and your daughters, welcome to you! But look you, don’t be wondering, or gazing so intently upon me.

Don’t you know Giddeneme, your female slave?

HANNO: I know her. But where are my daughters? That I’m longing to know.

GIDDENEME: At the Temple of Venus.

HANNO: What are they doing there? Tell me.

GIDDENEME: To-day is the Aphrodisia, the festive day of Venus! they have gone there to entreat the Goddess to be propitious to them.

MILPHIO: I’ faith, they’ve fully prevailed, I’m sure, inasmuch as he has arrived here.

AGORASTOCLES: (aside to GIDDENEME.) How now, are these his daughters?

GIDDENEME: Just as you say. (To HANNO.) Your kindness has clearly come to our rescue, in your having arrived here to-day at the very time; for this day their names were to have been changed, and they were to have made a livelihood, disgraceful to their station, by their persons.

A BOY: Haudones illi.

GIDDENEME: Havon bene si illi, in mustine.

Me ipsi et eneste dum et alamna cestinum.

AGORASTOCLES: What is it they are saying among themselves? Tell me.

MILPHIO: He’s saluting his mother, and she this her son.

HANNO: Hold your peace, and let alone the woman’s gear.

MILPHIO: What gear is that?

HANNO: Loud talking without limit.

(To MILPHIO.) Do you lead these people in-doors (pointing to his SERVANTS.) and bid this nurse to come away together with you to your house.

AGORASTOCLES: (to MILPHIO.) Do as he requests.

GIDDENEME: (to HANNO.) But who’s to point them out to you?

AGORASTOCLES: I will, right skilfully.

GIDDENEME: I’ll go away then.

AGORASTOCLES: I’d only rather that you would do so, than say so. (She goes into the house of AGORASTOCLES.)

MILPHIO: Upon my faith, I do think that this day the very thing that I said by way of joke will be coming to pass both soberly and seriously, that these will be discovered to-day to be his daughters.

AGORASTOCLES: Troth, that very thing is quite certain now. Do you, Milphio, take them (pointing to the SERVANTS) in-doors; we’ll wait here for these damsels.

I wish a dinner to be got ready for my kinsman on his arrival.

MILPHIO: Lachananim you! (aside to the SERVANTS.) whom I’ll just now be packing off to the mill-stones, and from there after that to the dungeon and the oaken log. I’ll give you reason to praise your treatment here but slightly.

AGORASTOCLES: (to HANNO.) Do you hear, kinsman? I say, don’t you revoke what has been said; promise me your elder daughter in marriage.

HANNO: Consider the thing as agreed on.

AGORASTOCLES: Do you promise her, then?

HANNO: I do promise her.

AGORASTOCLES: My kinsman, blessings on you! for now you are mine beyond a doubt; now at length shall I converse with her without restraint.

Now, kinsman, if you wish to see your daughters, follow me.

HANNO: Why, really, this long time I’ve been longing for it, and I’ll follow you.

AGORASTOCLES: What if we go and meet them?

HANNO: But I’m afraid lest we should pass them on the road. Great Jupiter, do now reinstate my fortunes for me as being certain instead of uncertain!

AGORASTOCLES: I trust that my charmer will be my own. But look, I catch sight of them.

HANNO: What, are these my daughters? How tall from being such little creatures have they now become!

AGORASTOCLES: Do you know how it is? These are Grecian columns; they are wont to be erect. (They stand aside.)

(Enter ADELPHASIUM and ANTERBASTYLIS, from the Temple of Venus.)

ADELPHASIUM: ’Twas worth the while, to-day, of him who has a taste for loveliness to afford a feast to his eyes, in coming hither to the Temple this day to see the sights. Upon my faith, I was charmed there to-day with the most elegant offerings of the courtesans, worthy of Venus, the most handsome Goddess; nor did I despise her worship this day; so great an abundance of beauteous objects was there there, each nicely arranged in its own place.

The odours of Arabia and of myrrh filled everything. The festive day seemed to be affected with no gloom, Venus, nor did thy Temple; so great a throng of her dependants was there, who had come to Venus of Calydon.

ANTERASTYLIS: But certainly, as far indeed as regarded us two, sister, we were all-powerful in our prayers, beauteous and gainers of her favour; neither were we there held in ridicule by the young men, which, i’ faith, sister, happened to all the rest.

ADELPHASIUM: I’d rather that it should so appear to other persons, than that you, sister, should praise yourself.

ANTERASTYLIS: Indeed, I trust so.

ADELPHASIUM: Troth, and so do I, when I reflect of what breeding we and the others are. We were born in that station, that it befits us to be unblemished by faultiness.

HANNO: (apart.) Jupiter, who dost preserve and feed the race of men, through whom we pass this mortal life, in whose hands are the hopes of life in all men, prithee, do grant this day as a prosperous one for my fortunes! Those whom I’ve missed for many years, and whom when little I lost from their native land, to them restore their liberty, that I may be sure that for an indomitable sense of duty there is a reward.

AGORASTOCLES: (apart.) I’ll engage that Jove shall do it all; for to me he is indebted, and stands in awe of me.

HANNO: (apart.) Prithee, do hold your peace. (He weeps.)

AGORASTOCLES: (apart.) Kinsman, do not weep.

ANTERASTYLIS: (apart.) As it is a pleasure for a man, my sister, if he succeeds in anything, to have the credit of victory, just so did we this day among the rest excel them all in beauty.

ADELPHASIUM: Sister, you are more silly than I could wish. Prithee, do you really think yourself a beauty, if your face has not been besmeared with soot?

AGORASTOCLES: (apart.) O kinsman! O kinsman, dearest of all kinsmen to me!

HANNO: (apart.) What is it, son of my cousin? My son, tell me, what is it you wish?

AGORASTOCLES: (apart.) Why, really, I do wish you to attend to this.

HANNO: (apart.) Why, really, I am attending to it.

AGORASTOCLES: (apart.) Kinsman, kinsman, dearest of all kinsmen to me!

HANNO: (apart.) What’s the matter?

AGORASTOCLES: (apart.) She’s a clever and a nice girl. How shrewd she is!

HANNO: (apart.) She has her father’s disposition in being shrewd.

AGORASTOCLES: (apart.) How’s that? This long time, i’ faith, she has surely used up your shrewdness.

’Tis from here (pointing to himself) she now derives her shrewdness;’tis from here her sense; whatever she does shrewdly, through my love does she act so shrewdly.

ADELPHASIUM: We are not born of that rank, although we are slaves, sister, that it should befit us to do anything which any man may laugh at. Many are the faults of women; but of the many, this one is the greatest, to please themselves too much, and to give their attention too little to pleasing the men.

ANTERASTYLIS: It was a very great delight that was portended in our sacrifice of the entrails, sister, and what the soothsayer said about us both—

AGORASTOCLES: (apart.) I wish he had said something about me!

ANTERASTYLIS: That we should be free in a few days, in spite of our owner. I don’t know why I should hope for that, unless the Gods or our parents do something.

AGORASTOCLES: (apart.) ’Twas through confidence in me, kinsman, upon my faith, that the soothsayer promised them liberty, I’m sure of it, because he knows I’m in love with her.

ADELPHASIUM: Sister, follow me this way. (Moves as if going.)

ANTERASTYLIS: I follow. (Moves also.)

HANNO: (stepping forward.) Before you go away, I want you both. Unless it’s inconvenient, stop.

ADELPHASIUM: Who’s calling us back?

AGORASTOCLES: One who wishes to do you a kindness.

ADELPHASIUM: There’s opportunity for doing it. But who is the person?

AGORASTOCLES: A friend of yours.

ADELPHASIUM: One who is not an enemy, in fact.

AGORASTOCLES: This is a good man, my love.

ADELPHASIUM: I’ faith, I should prefer him rather than a bad one.

AGORASTOCLES: If, indeed, friendship must be engaged in, with such a person ought it to be engaged in.

ADELPHASIUM: I don’t beg for it.

AGORASTOCLES: He wishes to do you many services.

ADELPHASIUM: Being good yourself you will be doing good to the good.

HANNO: I will cause you joy—

ADELPHASIUM: And, i’ faith, we pleasure to you.

HANNO: And liberty.

ADELPHASIUM: At that price you’ll easily make us your own.

AGORASTOCLES: My kinsman, so may the Gods bless me, if I were Jupiter, upon my faith I’d at once marry her for my wife, and pack Juno out of doors. How quietly did she utter her words, how considerately and becomingly! how modestly did she frame her speech! certainly she is my own!

HANNO: (apart to AGORASTOCLES.) But how skilfully I accosted her!

AGORASTOCLES: Cleverly and becomingly, upon my faith.

HANNO: Am I still to go on testing them?

AGORASTOCLES: Compress it in a few words; the people who are sitting here are getting thirsty.

HANNO: Well, why don’t we proceed to do that which was to be done? (To the WOMEN.) I summon you to justice.

AGORASTOCLES: Seize hold of this one, kinsman, if you are wise. Should you like me to catch hold of her?

ADELPHASIUM: Is this person your kinsman, Agorastocles?

AGORASTOCLES: I’ll soon let you know. Now, by my word, I’ll be nicely revenged on you; for I’ll make—you my bride.

HANNO: Come before a court of justice; don’t delay!

AGORASTOCLES: Summon me as your witness, and take me; I’ll be a witness for you; and after that, her (pointing to ADELPHASIUM) will I love and embrace. But’twas this, indeed, I intended to say—why yes, I did say that which I intended to say.

HANNO: (to the DAMSELS.) You are lingering. I summon you to justice, unless it is more becoming for you to be dragged thither.

ADELPHASIUM: Why do you summon us to justice? What are we in your debt?

AGORASTOCLES: He’ll tell it there.

ADELPHASIUM: Are even my own dogs barking at me?

AGORASTOCLES: Then, troth, do you caress me;

give me a kiss in place of a piece of meat; present your lips in place of a bone: that way I’ll render this dog more smooth for you than oil.

HANNO: Come on, if you are coming.

ADELPHASIUM: What have we done to you?

HANNO: You are thieves, both of you.

ADELPHASIUM: What, we, as regards you?

HANNO: You, I say.

AGORASTOCLES: And I know it.

ADELPHASIUM: What theft is this?

AGORASTOCLES: Enquire of him.

HANNO: Because for many years you have been concealing my daughters from me, and, in fact, persons free-born, and free, and born of the highest rank.

ADELPHASIUM: I’ faith, you’ll never find that villany to have been committed by us.

AGORASTOCLES: Make a bet of a kiss now, if you are not forsworn, which is to give it to the other.

ADELPHASIUM: I’ve nothing to do with you; prithee, get you gone.

AGORASTOCLES: But, i’ faith, I’ve got something to do with you; for he is my kinsman; it’s necessary for me to be his advocate.

And I’ll inform him how you are guilty of many a theft, and in what way you have got his daughters as slaves at your house, whom you know to be free women stolen from their native land.

ADELPHASIUM: Where are these, or who are they, prithee?

AGORASTOCLES: (aside to HANNO.) They have been teased sufficiently.

HANNO: (aside.) Why not speak out, then?

AGORASTOCLES: (aside.) I’ faith, I’m of that opinion, kinsman.

ADELPHASIUM: I’m dreadfully afraid what this business can mean, my sister; so astounded am I, I stand here without my senses.

HANNO: Damsels, give me your attention. In the first place, if it could possibly come to pass, for the Gods not to send upon the innocent what is undeserved, that could I have wished to happen; now for the good the Gods bestow upon me, upon yourselves and upon your nurse,’tis due that we should give to the Deities our endless thanks, since the immortal Gods approve and reward our piety. You are my daughters, both of you, and this is your relation, Agorastocles, the son of my cousin.

ADELPHASIUM: Prithee, are they deluding us with imaginary joys?

AGORASTOCLES: Really, so may the Deities preserve me, this is your father. Give him your hands.

ADELPHASIUM: (embracing him.) Welcome, father! unhoped-for by us, allow us to embrace you!

ANTERASTYLIS: (embracing him.) Welcome, father! much wished and longed for!

We are both your daughters;

we both embrace you.

AGORASTOCLES: Who’ll be for embracing me in the next place?

HANNO: Now am I happy! Now with this delight do I allay the miseries of many a year.

ADELPHASIUM: We hardly seem to believe this.

HANNO: I’ll tell you something to make you believe it the more:

why, it was your nurse who recognized me first.

ADELPHASIUM: Prithee, where is she?

HANNO: (pointing to AGORASTOCLES.) She’s at his house.

AGORASTOCLES: (to ADELPHASIUM, who is embracing her father.) Pray, why does it please you to clasp his neck so long, before he has betrothed you to me?

Dear one, much longed-for, blessings on you! (He embraces her.)

ADELPHASIUM: (struggling.) Do leave off your salutations!

AGORASTOCLES: I will leave off.

And you the other one. (To ANTERASTYLIS, whom he embraces.

ANTERASTYLIS: (struggling.) I don’t want that; you torment me to death!

HANNO: Let us each clasp the other in our arms, than whom is there anything on earth more happy?

AGORASTOCLES: Blessings befall the deserving.

(Pointing to HANNO.) At last his wishes are realized!

O Apelles! O Zeuxis the painter! why did you die too soon? Would that you could paint a subject after this! For I don’t care for other common painters to be treating subjects of this description.

HANNO: Gods and Goddesses all! I return you deservedly extreme thanks, for having blest me with this gladness so supreme and with these joys so great; as my daughters have returned to me and into my possession.

ADELPHASIUM: My father, your own piety has clearly come to our aid.

AGORASTOCLES: Kinsman, take care and keep it in memory that you’ve betrothed your elder daughter to me—

HANNO: I remember it.

AGORASTOCLES: The portion, too, that you promised.

(Enter ANTHEMONIDES, from the house of LYCUS.)

ANTHEMONIDES: (to himself.) If I don’t take full revenge for that mina which I gave to the Procurer, then really may the townspeople make a butt of me! This most rascally fellow even brought me to his house to breakfast. He himself went away out of doors, and left me as his chamberlain in the house. When neither the Procurer nor these women came back, nor anything was given me to eat, for the best part of the breakfast I took a pledge, and came out of doors. This way I’ll pay him. I’ll touch up the rascally Procurer in the military way of payment. He did get hold of a person for him to bamboozle out of a mina of silver! But I wish that my mistress would now come in my way while thus enraged. Then, by my troth, with my fists I’d make her quite black all over;

I’d cover her so with swarthiness, that she should be much more swarthy than the Egyptians, or than those who carry the buckets at the games in the Circus.

ADELPHASIUM: (running to AGORASTOCLES.) Do hold me fast, please, my love; I sadly fear the kites; this is an evil animal—lest perchance he may carry me off, your chick.

ANTERASTYLIS: (embracing her FATHER.) I cannot clasp you fast enough, my father!

ANTHEMONIDES: (to himself.) I’m delaying.

(Looking in his hand.) I can now pretty nearly cater a breakfast for myself with this. (Raising his eyes.) But what’s this? How’s this? What’s this? What’s this I see? How now? What means this strange conjunction? What’s this coupling together? Who’s this fellow with the long skirts, just like a tavern-boy? Do I quite see with my eyes? Isn’t this my mistress, Anterastylis?

Why, surely it is she. For some time past I’ve perceived that I’m set at nought. Isn’t the girl ashamed to be hugging a tawny fellow in the middle of the street? I faith, I shall give him up forthwith to the executioner to be tortured all over. Surely this is a womanish race, with their tunics hanging down to their heels. But I’m determined to accost this African female lover.

(To HANNO.) Hallo! you woman, I say, are you not ashamed? What business have you with her, pray? Tell me.

HANNO: Young man, greetings to you.

ANTHEMONIDES: I don’t want them; that’s nothing to you. What business have you to touch her with a finger?

HANNO: Because I choose.

ANTHEMONIDES: You choose?

HANNO: I say so.

ANTHEMONIDES: Away to utter perdition, you shoe-latchet!

What, do you dare to be acting the lover here, you great toe of a man, or to be meddling with an object which masculine men are fond of, you skinnea pilchard, you deformed image of Serapis, you half-apron, you sheepskin-jacket, you pot of stinking sea-salt; more crammed, too, to boot, with leeks and garlick than the Roman rowers?

AGORASTOCLES: Young man, do your jaws or your teeth itch, that you are annoying this person, or are you in search of a heavy mishap?

ANTHEMONIDES: Why didn’t you use a drum while you were saying that? For I take you to be more of an effeminate wretch than a real man.

AGORASTOCLES: Do you understand what sort of effeminate wretch I am? (Calling aloud.) Servants, come out of doors, bring out some cudgels!

ANTHEMONIDES: Hark you, if I have said anything in a joke, don’t you be for taking it seriously.

ANTERASTYLIS: Prithee, what pleasure have you, Anthemonides, in speaking rudely to our kinsman and father? For this is our father; he has just now recognized us, and him as the son of his cousin.

ANTHEMONIDES: So may Jupiter kindly bless me, I heartily rejoice that it is so, and I am delighted, if, in fact, any great misfortune befalls this Procurer, and since a fortune awaits you equal to your merits.

ANTERASTYLIS: I’ faith, he says what’s worthy of belief; do believe him, my father.

HANNO: I do believe him.

AGORASTOCLES: And I believe him. But look (pointing.) I espy the Procurer Lycus, the worthy fellow; look, there he is—he’s betaking himself homeward.

HANNO: Who is this?

AGORASTOCLES: He’s which you please, both the Procurer and Lycus. He has been keeping your daughters in servitude, and from myself he has stolen some gold.

HANNO: A pretty fellow for you to be acquainted with!

AGORASTOCLES: Let’s bring him to justice.

HANNO: By no means.

AGORASTOCLES: For what reason?

HANNO: Because’twere better for an action of damages to be brought against him.

(Enter LYCUS.)

LYCUS: (to himself.) No one, in my opinion at least, is deceived, who rightly states his case to his friends.

But by all my friends the one same thing is agreed upon, that I ought to hang myself, so as not to be adjudged to Agorastocles.

AGORASTOCLES: (stepping forward.) Procurer, let’s away to the court of justice.

LYCUS: I do entreat you, Agorastocles, that I may be at liberty to hang myself.

HANNO: I summon you to justice.

LYCUS: But what have you to do with me?

HANNO: (pointing at his DAUGHTERS.) Because I affirm that both of these are my daughters, free women, and free by birth, who, when little, were kidnapped together with their nurse.

LYCUS: Indeed, I knew that already, and I wondered that no one came to assert their freedom; they really are none of mine, indeed.

ANTHEMONIDES: Procurer, you must come to justice.

LYCUS: You are talking about the breakfast; it is owing to you; I’ll give it.

AGORASTOCLES: Twofold compensation I must have for the theft.

LYCUS: (pointing to his neck.) Take it out of this, then.

HANNO: And I require a full satisfaction.

LYCUS: (pointing to his neck.) Take out of this whatever you please.

ANTHEMONIDES: And I, indeed, a mina of silver.

LYCUS: (pointing to his neck.) Take out of this whatever you please. I’ll at once settle the matter for all with my neck, just like a porter.

AGORASTOCLES: Do you refuse me in any way?

LYCUS: Not a word, in fact.

AGORASTOCLES: Go in-doors, then, damsels. But (to HANNO.) my kinsman, betroth me your daughter, as you promised.

HANNO: I should not venture to do otherwise.

ANTHEMONIDES: Kindly farewell!

AGORASTOCLES: And kindly farewell to you!

ANTHEMONIDES: (holding up what he has got in his hand.) Procurer, I take this as a pledge with me for my mina.

LYCUS: By heavens, I am ruined!

AGORASTOCLES: Why yes, before very long, when you’ve come to justice.

LYCUS: Nay but, I own myself your slave. What need of the Praetor have we? But I beseech you that I may be allowed to pay the simple sum, three hundred Philippeans. I think it can be scraped together; to-morrow I’ll have an auction.

AGORASTOCLES: On condition, then, that you shall be in wooden custody at my house.

LYCUS: So be it.

AGORASTOCLES: Follow me in-doors, my kinsman, that we may keep this festive day in joyousness, upon his misfortune and our good fortune. (To the AUDIENCE.) Heartily fare you well. To great length have we gone; at last all these misfortunes fall upon the Procurer.

Now—that which is the last seasoning for our Play—if it has pleased you, our Comedy asks applause.

(AGORASTOCLES, LYCUS, HANNO, ANTHEMONIDES, ADELPHASIUM, and ANTERASTYLIS.

AGORASTOCLES: What is it you are about, Captain? Why does it please you to speak rudely to my relative? Don’t be surprised that the damsels do follow after him; he has just now discovered that both of them are his own daughters.

LYCUS: (starting.) Hah! what speech was it that reached my ears? Now I am undone!

(To AGORASTOCLES.) From what house were these females lost?

AGORASTOCLES: They are Carthaginians.

LYCUS: Then I am ruined. I was always in dread of that, lest some one should recognize them, a thing which has now come to pass. Woe unto wretched me!

My eighteen minae are lost, I guess, which I paid for them.

AGORASTOCLES: And you yourself are lost, Lycus.

HANNO: Who is this?

AGORASTOCLES: Which you please, he’s either the Procurer or Lycus. He has been keeping your daughters in servitude, and from myself he has stolen some gold.

HANNO: A pretty fellow for you to be acquainted with!

AGORASTOCLES: Procurer, I always deemed you to be avaricious, but they know you to be a thief as well, who know more of you.

LYCUS: I’ll approach him. (He falls on the ground before AGORASTOCLES.) By your knees I do beseech you, and by him (pointing to HANNO.) whom I understand to be your relative; since you are deserving persons, as it befits deserving persons to do, do then come to the aid of your suppliant! Indeed, already did I know them to be free women, and was waiting for some one to claim their freedom, for really they are none of mine. Then besides, I’ll restore your gold that I’ve got in my house, and I’ll make oath that I have done nothing, Agorastocles, with ill intent.

AGORASTOCLES: As it’s right for me to do, I shall still consult my own notions. Let go of my knees.

LYCUS: I’ll let them go, if such is your determination. (He rises from the ground, and retires to a distance.)

AGORASTOCLES: Hark you! Procurer.

LYCUS: What do you want with a Procurer amid business?

AGORASTOCLES: You to restore me my money before I take you hence to be laid in fetters.

LYCUS: May the Gods grant better things!

AGORASTOCLES: Even so; you’ll be dining away from home. I see Gold, silver, and your neck, Procurer, the three things are you now owing to me all at once.

HANNO: What it befits me to do in this matter, I’m considering with myself. If I should attempt to take vengeance on this fellow, I shall be engaging in litigation in a strange city. So far as I hear, his disposition and manners, of the nature that they are—

ADELPHASIUM: My father, do have no dealings with this man, I conjure you.

ANTERASTYLIS: Do listen to my sister. Come, put an end to your strife with the rascal.

HANNO: Attend to this, will you, Procurer. Although I know that you deserve to come to ruin, I’ll not try the matter with you.

AGORASTOCLES: Nor I, if you restore me my gold; Procurer, when let go from the fetters—you may get thrust into prison.

LYCUS: What, your old habit still?

ANTHEMONIDES: Carthaginian, I wish to excuse myself to you. If I have said anything in my passion against the inclination of your feelings, I beg that you will pardon it; and as you have found these daughters of yours, so may the Deities bless me, it is a pleasure to me.

HANNO: I both forgive and believe you.

ANTERLASTYIS: Procurer, do you take care either to find me a mistress, or return me the mina of gold.

LYCUS: Should you like to have my music-girl?

ANTHEMONIDES: I don’t care for a music-girl; you don’t know which is the greater, their cheeks or their bosoms.

LYCUS: I’ll find one to please you.

ANTHEMONIDES: Mind that.

LYCUS: (to AGORASTOCLES.) To-morrow I’ll bring back your gold to your house.

AGORASTOCLES: Take care that you keep that in memory.

Captain, follow me.

ANTHEMONIDES: Yes, I’ll follow you. (LYCUS goes into his house.)

AGORASTOCLES: (to HANNO.) How say you, kinsman? When are you thinking of leaving here for Carthage?— for I’m determined to go together with you.

HANNO: As soon as ever I can, that instant I shall go.

AGORASTOCLES: It’s necessary for you to stop here some days, until I’ve had an auction.

HANNO: I’ll do just as you wish.

AGORASTOCLES: Come, please, let’s be off; let’s enjoy ourselves. (To the AUDIENCE.) Grant us your applause.]