Book 1
Imperial Apuleius LatinIn this Milesian talc I shall string together divers stories, and delight your kindly ears with a pleasant history, if you will not scorn to look upon this Egyptian paper written with a ready pen of Nile reeds—stories of men's form's and fortunes transformed into different shapes, and then restored again in due sequence back into their selves—a true subject for wonder. Who is the author? In a few words you shall understand. Hymettus of Athens, the Isthmus of Corinth, Taenarus of Sparta, being famous lands (as I pray you give credit to the books of more everlasting fame), be places where mine ancient progeny and lineage did sometime flourish: there when I was young I went first to school and learned the Attic speech. Soon after (as a stranger) I arrived at Rome, where by. great industry, and without instruction of any schoolmaster, I arrived at the full perfection of the Latin tongue: behold, I first crave and beg your pardon, lest I should happen to displease or offend any of you by the rude and rustic utterance of this strange and foreign language. And verily this change of speech doth correspond to the enter- prise and matter whereof I purpose to treat, like a rider leaping from horse to horse; I set forth unto you a Grecian story: whereto, gentle reader, if thou attend and give ear, thou shalt be well contented withal.
I fortuned to travel into Thessaly, about certain affairs which I had to do (for there, my ancestry by my mother's side inhabiteth, descended of the line of that most excellent person Plutarch, and of Sextus the philosopher his nephew, which is to us a great worship and honour); and after that by much travel and great pain, I had passed over the high mountains and slippery valleys, and had ridden through the dewy grass and fallowed fields, perceiving that my horse, a white thoroughbred of that country, did wear somewhat slow, and to the intent likewise I might repose and strengthen myself (being weary of long sitting) I lighted off my horse on to my feet, and wiping carefully away the sweat from his head, and stroking his ears, I unbridled him, and walked him on to a gentle slope, to the end that he might by nature's relief ease himself of his weariness; and while he went taking his morning graze in the field (casting his head sometimes aside as a token of rejoicing and gladness) I perceived a little before me two companions riding,and so I overtaking them made a third. And while I listened to hear their conversation, one of them laughed, and mocked his fellow, saying: Leave off, I pray thee, and speak no more, for I cannot abide to hear thee tell such absurd incredible lies. Which when I heard I desired to hear some news, and said: I pray you, masters, make me partaker of your talk, that am not so curious as desirous to know all you say, or most of it. So shall the difficulty of this high hill before us be lightened by merry and pleasant talk.
But he that had laughed first, said: Verily this tale is as true as if a man would say that by sorcery and enchantment the swift rivers might be forced to run against their courses; the sea to be bound immovable; the winds to lose their force and die; the sun to be restrained from his natural journey; the moon to drop her foam upon the earth; the stars to be pulled down from heaven; the day to be darkened; and the night be made to continue for ever.
Then I, speaking more confidently, said: I pray yon, you that began to tell }Tour tale even now, leave not off so, but tell the residue. And turning to the other, I said: You perhaps, that are of gross ears and an obstinate mind, mock and contemn those things which are perchance really the truth; know you not, i' faith, that those things are accounted untrue by the false opinion of men, which are either seldom heard or rarely seen, or are so high that they pass the capacity of man's reason? The which if you scan them more narrowly, you shall not only find them evident to the understanding, but even very easy to be brought to pass. Look you: the other night, being at supper with my fellows, while I did greedily put in my mouth a great morsel of barley fried with cheese, it stuck so fast, being soft and doughy, in the passage of my throat and my windpipe, that I was well nigh choked. And yet lately at Athens, before the porch there called the Poecile, I saw with these two eyes of mine a juggler that swallowed up a knight's sword with a very keen edge, and by and by, for a little money that we that looked on gave him, he devoured a hunting spear with the point downward;
and over the blade of the spear, where the haft of the spear turned down rose through the throat towards his pate, there appeared on it (which caused us all who were present to marvel) a fair boy pleasant and nimble, winding and turning himself in such sort that you would suppose that he had neither bone nor gristle, and verily think he was the natural serpent, creeping and sliding where the twigs are cut off on the knotted staff of rough wood which the god of medicine is wont to bear. But do you, I pray you, that began, repeat your tale again, and I alone, in place of your fellow, will give credit unto you, and for your pains, will pay your charges for your supper at the next inn we conic unto.
To this he answered: Certes, sir, I thank you for your gentle offer, and, at your request, I will proceed in my tale; but first I will swear unto you by the light of this Sun, the God that seeth all, that those things which I shall tell be true; nor, when you come to the next city, which is of Thessaly, will you doubt anything of it, for it is rife in the mouths of every person which was done before the face of all men. And that I may first make relation to you, what and who I am, and whither I go, and for what livelihood; know ye, that I am of Aegina, travelling these countries about from Thessaly to Aetolia, and from Aetolia to Boeotia, to provide for honey, cheese, and other victuals to sell again. And understanding that at Hypata (which is the principal city of all Thessaly) are sold fresh cheeses of exceeding good taste and relish, I fortuned on a day to go thither to make my market there of the whole. But (as it often happens) I came in an evil hour, for one Lupus, a wholesale purveyor, had bought up all the day before, and so I was deceived of my profit. Where- fore towards night (being greatly wearied by my hurrying, though it had been of none effect) I went to the baths to refresh myself, and behold, I fortuned to espy my companion Socrates. He was sitting upon the ground, covered with a torn and coarse mantle, so meagre and of so sallow and miserable a countenance that I scantly knew him: for fortune had brought him into such estate that he verily seemed as a common beggar that stands in the streets to crave the benevolence of the passersby. Towards whom (howbeit he was my singular friend and familiar acquaintance) yet half in doubt, I drew nigh and said: ' Alas! my Socrates, what meaneth this, how dost thou so appear? What crime hast thou committed? Verily there is great lamentation and weeping made for thee at home: thy children are in ward by decree of the provincial judge: thy wife (having ended her mourning time in lamentable wise with her face and visage blubbered with tears in such sort that she hath well nigh wept out both her eyes) is constrained by her parents to put out of remembrance the unfortunate loss and lack of thee at home, by taking (against her will) a new husband. And dost thou live here as a ghost or beggar to our great shame and ignominy?' Then answered he to me, and said: 'O my friend Aristomenes, now perceive I well that you are ignorant of the whirling changes, the unstable forces, and slippery inconstancy of fortune ': and therewithal he covered his face (even then blushing for very shame) with his ragged mantle, so that the lower part of his body appeared all naked. But I, not willing to see him any longer in such great misery and calamity, took him by the hand to lift him up from the ground: who
(having his face covered in such sort) ' Let fortune' (quoth he) 'Triumph yet more, let her have her sway, and finish that which she hath begun.'
Then did I force him to follow and put off one of my garments, and clothed, nay, rather covered him, and immediately I brought him to the bath; with my own hands I served him with what he needed for anointing and wiping. I diligently rubbed away the filthy scurf of his body; which done, although I was very weary myself, and hardly held him up, yet I led the poor wretch to my inn, where I bade him repose his body upon a bed, and brought him meat and drink, and refreshed him with talking together. Then we grew free and merry, laughed and joked wittily, now he talked without any fear, until such time as he (fetching a pitiful sigh from the bottom of his heart, and beating his face in miserable sort) began to say: ' Alas, poor wretch that I am, that only for the desire to see a game, famous enough, of trial of weapons, am fallen into these miseries and misfortunes. For, having set out, as thou knowest, for Macedonia, on my business, and returning the richer after the space of ten months, a little before that I came to Larissa I turned out of the way to view those games, and behold, in the bottom of a pathless and hollow valley, I was suddenly environed with a wild company of thieves, who robbed and spoiled me of such things as I had: and hardly did I escape, but (being in such extremity) in the end was delivered from them and fortuned to come to the house of a woman that sold wine, called Meroe; old was she, yet not unpleasing; unto whom I opened the causes of my long peregrination and careful home-coming, and of my unlucky robbery; and after that she gently entertained me, and made me more than good cheer, with a supper free of charge; and by and by, being pricked by carnal desire, she brought me to her own bedchamber; where I (poor wretch) from the very first night of our being together, did purchase to myself this miserable servitude, and I gave her such apparel as the kind thieves had left to cover me withal, and also the little wages that I had gained by carrying bags when still whole and sound, until this good dame and evil fortune brought me to that appearance in which you have just seen me.'
Then said I unto him: ' In faith, thou art worthy to sustain the most extreme misery and calamity, and anything there may be even beyond this last, which hast defiled thine own body, forsaken thy wife traitorously and dishonoured thy children, parents and friends for the love of a vile harlot and old strumpet.' When Socrates heard me rail against Meroe in such sort, he held up his forefinger to his lips, and, as half astonied, said: ' Peace, peace, I pray you,' and, looking about lest any person should hear, ' I pray you' (quoth he) 'Take heed what you say against so venerable a woman as she is, lest by your intemperate tongue you catch some harm.' 'What?' (quoth I) 'This hostess, so mighty and a queen, what manner of woman is she, I pray you tell me?' Then answered he: ' Verily, she is a magician, and of divine might, which hath power to bring down the sky, to bear up the earth, to turn the waters into hills and the hills into running waters, to call up the terrestrial spirits into the air, and to pull the gods out of the heavens, to extinguish the planets, and to lighten the very darkness of hell.' Then said I unto Socrates: ' I pray you leave off this high and tragical kind of talk and away with the scenic curtain and tell the matter in a more plain and simple fashion.' Then answered he: ' Will you hear one or two or more of the deeds which she hath done? For whereas she enforceth not only the inhabitants of this country here, but also the Indians and Ethiopians and even the Antipodeans to love her in most raging sort, such are but trifles and chips of her occupation; but I pray you give ear, and I will declare of greater matters, which she hath done openly and before the face of all men.
' This woman had a certain lover whom, by the utterance of one only word, she turned into a beaver because he loved another woman beside her, and the reason why she transformed him into such a beast, is that it is his nature, when he perceives the hunters and hounds to draw after him, to bite off his members and lay them in the way, that-'the pursuers may be at a stop when they find them, and to the intent that so it might happen unto him (because he fancied another woman) she turned him into that kind of shape. Likewise she changed one of her neighbours, being an old man and one that sold wine, in that he was a rival of her occupation, into a frog, and now the poor wretch swimming in one of his own pipes of wine, and being well nigh drowned in the dregs, doth cry and call with croakings continually for his old guests and acquaintance that pass by. Likewise she turned one of the advocates of the Court (because he pleaded and spake against her) into a horned ram, and now the poor ram doth act advocate. Moreover she caused the wife of a certain lover that she had, because she spake sharply and wittily against her, should never be delivered of her child, but should remain, her womb closed up, everlastingly pregnant, and according to the computation of all men, it is eight years past since the poor woman began first to swell, and now she is increased so big that she seemeth as though she would bring forth some great elephant: and when this was known abroad and published throughout all the town, they took indignation against her, and ordained that the next day she should be most cruelly stoned to death; which purpose of theirs she prevented by the virtue of her enchantments, and as Medea (who obtained of King Creon but one day's respite before her departure) did burn in the flames of the bride's garland all his house, him and his daughter, so she, by her conjurations and invocation of spirits, which she uses over a certain trench, as she herself declared unto me being drunken the next day following, closed all the persons of the town so sure in their houses, by the secret power of her gods, that for the space of two days they could not come forth, nor open their gates nor doors, nor even break down their walls; whereby they were enforced by mutual consent to cry unto her and to bind themselves straitly that they would never after molest or hurt her, and moreover if any did offer her any injury they would be ready to defend her; whereupon she, moved at their promises, released all the town. But she conveyed the principal author of this ordinance, about midnight, with all his house, the walls, the ground and the foundation, into another town distant from thence a hundred miles situate and being on the top of a barren hill, and by reason thereof destitute of water: and because the edifices and houses were so close builded together that it was not possible for the house to stand there, she threw down the same before the gate of the town.'
Then spake I and said: 'O my friend Socrates, you have declared unto me many marvellous things and no less cruel, and moreover stricken me also with no small trouble of mind, yea rather with great prick of fear, lest the same old woman, using the like practice, should chance to hear all our communication: wherefore let us now sleep, though it be early, and after that we have done away our weariness with rest let us rise betimes in the morning and ride from hence before day as far as we may.'
In speaking these words, it fortuned that Socrates did fall asleep, and snored very soundly, by reason of his new plenty of meat and wine and his long travail. Then I closed and barred fast the doors of the chamber, and put my bed and made it fast behind the door and so laid me down to rest; but at first I could in no wise sleep for the -great fear which was in my heart, until it was about midnight, and then I closed my eyes for a little: but alas, I had just begun to sleep, when behold suddenly the chamber doors brake open; nay, the locks, bolts and posts fell down with greater force than if thieves had been presently come to have spoiled and robbed us. And my bed whereon I lay, being a truckle-bed and somewhat short, and one of the feet broken and rotten, by violence was turned upside down, and I likewise was overwhelmed and covered lying in the same.
Then perceived I in myself, that certain effects of the mind by nature are turned contrary. For as tears oftentimes are shed for joy, so I being in this fearful perplexity could not forbear laughing, to see how of Aristomenes I was made like unto a tortoise. And while I lay on the ground covered in the happy protection of my pallet, I peeped from under the bed to see what would happen. And behold there entered two old women, the one bearing a burning torch, and the other a sponge and a naked sword. And so in this habit they stood about Socrates being fast asleep. Then she which bare the sword said unto the other: ' Behold, sister Panthia, this is my dear Endymion and my sweet Ganymede, which both day and night hath abused my wanton youthfulness; this is he (who little regarding my love) doth not only defame me with reproachful words, but also intendeth to run away. And I shall be forsaken by like craft as Ulysses did use, and shall continually bewail my solitariness as Calypso'; which said she pointed towards me, that lay under the bed, and shewed me to Panthia. 'This is he,' quoth she, ' Which is his good counsellor, Aristomenes, and persuadeth him to forsake me and now (being at the point of death) he lieth prostrate on the ground covered with his bed, and hath seen all our doings, and hopeth to escape scot-free from my hands for all his insults; but I will cause that he shall repent himself too late, nay rather forthwith of his former intemperate language and his present curiosity.'
Which words when I heard, I fell into a cold sweat, and my heart trembled with fear, in so much that the bed over me did likewise rattle and shake and dance with my trembling. Then spake Panthia unto Meroe, and said: ' Sister, let us by and by tear him in pieces, or else tie him by the members and so cut them off.' Then Meroe (for thus I learned that her name really was that which I had heard in Socrates' tale) answered: ' Nay, rather let him live, to bury the corpse of this poor wretch in some hole of the earth,' and therewithal she turned the head of Socrates on the other side, and thrust her' sword up to the hilt into the left part of his neck, and received the blood that gushed out with a small bladder, that no drop thereof fell beside; this thing I saw with mine own eyes; and then Meroe, to the intent (as I think) she might alter nothing that pertaineth to sacrifice, which she accustomed to make, thrust her hand down through that wound into the entrails of his body, and searching about, at length brought forth the heart of my miserable companion Socrates, who (having his throat cut in such sort) gave out a doleful cry by the wound, or rather a gasping breath, and gave up the ghost. Then Panthia stopped the wide wound of his throat with the sponge and said: ' O, sponge sprung and made of the sea, beware that thou pass not over a running river.' This being said, they moved and turned up my bed, and then they strode over me and staled upon me till I was wringing wet.
When this was ended, they went their ways and the doors closed fast, the hinges sank in their old sockets, the bolts ran into the doorposts, the pins fell into the bars again. But I that lay upon the ground, like one without soul, naked and cold and wringing wet with filth, like to one that were newly born, or rather, one that were more than half dead, yet reviving myself, and appointed as I thought for the gallows, began to say: ' Alas, what shall become of me to-morrow when my companion shall be found murdered here in the chamber? To whom shall I seem to tell any similitude of truth, when as I shall tell the truth indeed? They will say: If thou, being so great a man, wert unable to resist the. violence of the woman, yet shouldst thou have cried at least for help; wilt thou suffer the man to be slain before thy face and say nothing? Or why did not they slay thee likewise? Why did their cruelty spare thee that stood by and saw them commit that horrible fact? Wherefore although thou hast escaped their hands, yet thou shalt not escape ours. '
While I pondered these things often with myself the night passed on into day, so I thought best to take my horse secretly before dawn and go fearfully forward on my journey. Thus I took up my packet, unlocked and unbarred the doors, but those good and faithful doors which in the night did open of their own accord could then scarcely be opened with their keys after frequent trials, and when I was out I cried: ' Ho, sirrah ostler, where art thou? Open the stable door, for I will ride away before dawn.' The ostler lying behind the stable door upon a pallet and half asleep, ' What? ' quoth he, ' Do not you know that the ways be very dangerous with robbers? What mean you to set forth at this time of night? If you perhaps (guilty of some heinous crime) be weary of your life, yet think you not that we are such pumpkin-headed sots that we will die for you.' Then said I: ' It is well nigh day, and moreover what can thieves take from him that hath nothing? Dost not thou know (fool as thou art) that if thou be naked, if ten trained wrestlers should assail thee, they could not spoil or rob thee?' Whereunto the drowsy ostler half asleep, and turning on the other side, answered: 'What know I whether you have murdered your companion whom you brought in yesternight or no, and now seek safety by escaping away?'
O Lord, at that time I remember that the earth seemed to open, and that I saw at Hell gate the dog Cerberus gaping to devour me, and then I verily believed that Meroe did not spare my throat, moved with pity, but rather cruelly pardoned me to bring me; to the gallows. Wherefore, I returned to my chamber and there devised with myself in what violent sort I should finish my life. But when I saw that fortune would minister unto me no other instrument than my bed, I said: e O bed, O bed, most dear unto me at this present, which hast abode and suffered with me so many miseries, judge and arbiter of such things as were done here this night, whom only I may call to witness for my innocence, render (I say) unto me some wholesome weapon to end my life that am most willing to die.' And therewithal I pulled out a piece of the rope wherewith the bed was corded, and tied one end thereof about a rafter which stood forth beneath the window, and with the other end I made a sliding knot and stood upon my bed to cast myself from aloft into destruction, and so put my neck into it. But when I pushed away-with my foot that which supported me beneath, so that the noose when my weight came upon it might choke the passage of my breath, behold suddenly the rope being old and rotten burst in the middle, and I fell down tumbling upon Socrates that lay nigh me, and with him rolled upon the floor. And even at that very time the ostler came in crying with a loud voice, and said: c Where are you that made such haste at deep night, and now lie wallowing and snoring abed?' Whereupon (I know not whether it was by our fall or by the harsh cry of the ostler) Socrates (as waking out of a sleep) did rise up first and said: ' It is not without cause that strangers do speak evil of all such ostlers, for this caitiff in his coming in, and with his crying out, I think under colour to steal away something, hath waked me, that was beside very weary, out of a sound sleep.'
Then I rose up joyful, as I hoped not to be, with a merry countenance, saying: ' Behold, good ostler, my friend, my companion and my brother whom thou being drunken in the night didst falsely affirm to be murdered by me.' And therewithal I embraced my friend Socrates and kissed him; but he smelling the stink wherewith those hags had embrued me, thrust me away and said: 'Away with thee with thy filthy odour,' and then he began gently to enquire how that noisome scent happened unto me, but I (with some light jest feigning and colouring the matter for the time) did break off his talk into another path, and take him by the hand and said: ' Why tarry we? Why leave we the pleasure of this fair morning? Let us go.' And so I took up my packet, and paid the charges of the house, and we departed.
We had not gone a mile out of the town but it was broad day, and then I diligently looked upon Socrates' throat to see if I could espy the place where Meroe thrust in her sword, and I thought with myself: ' What a madman am I, that (being overcome with wine yesternight) have dreamed such terrible things! Behold, I see Socrates is sound, safe and in health. Where is his wound? Where is the sponge? Where is his great and new cut? ' And then I spake to him and said: ' Verily it is not without occasion that physicians of experience do affirm, that such as fill their gorges abundantly with meat and drink shall dream of dire and horrible sights, for I myself (not restraining mine appetite yesternight from the pots of wine) did seem to see in this bitter night strange and cruel visions, that even yet I think myself sprinkled and wet with human blood'; whereunto Socrates laughing, made answer and said:
' Nay, thou art not wet with the blood of men, but thou art embrued with stinking filth: and verily I myself dreamed this night that my throat was cut and that I felt the pain of the wound, and that my heart was pulled out of my belly, and the remembrance thereof makes me now to fear, and my knees do tremble that I totter in my gait, and therefore I would fain eat somewhat to strengthen and revive my spirits.' Then said I: 1 Behold, here is thy breakfast,' and therewithal I opened my scrip that hanged upon my shoulder, and gave him bread and cheese, and ' Let us sit down,' quoth I, ' Under that great plane-tree.'
Now I also ate part of the same with him: and while I beheld him eating greedily, I perceived that he wore thin and meagre and pale as boxwood, and that his lively colour faded away, as did mine also, remembering those terrible furies of whom I lately dreamed, in so much that the first morsel of bread that I put in my mouth (which was but very small) did so stick in my jaws that I could neither swallow it down nor yet yield it up; and moreover the number of them that passed by increased my fear, for who is he, that would believe that one of two companions die in the high way without injury done by the other? But when that Socrates had eaten sufficiently he wore very thirsty, for indeed he had well nigh devoured a whole good cheese, and behold there was behind the roots of the plane-tree a pleasant running water which went gently like to a quiet pond, as clear as silver or crystal, and I said unto him: ' Come hither, Socrates, to this water and drink thy fill as it were milk.' And then he rose, land waiting a little he found a flat space by the river and kneeled down by the side of the bank in bis greedy desire to drink; but he had scarce touched the water with his lips when behold, the wound of his throat opened wide, and the sponge suddenly fell into the water and after issued out a little remnant of blood, and his body (being then without life) had fallen into the river, had not I caught him by the leg, and so with great ado pulled him up. And after that I had lamented a good space the death of my wretched companion, I buried him in the sands to dwell for ever there by the river. Which done, trembling and in great fear I rode through many outways and desert places, and as if culpable of murder, I forsook my country, my wife and my children, and came to Aetolia, an exile of my own free will, where I married another wife.
This tale told Aristomenes, and his fellow which before obstinately would give no credit unto him, began to say: Verily there was never so foolish a tale, nor a more absurd lie told than this; and then he spake unto me, saying: Ho, sir, what you are I know not, but your habit and countenance declareth that you should be some honest gentleman, do you believe his tale? Yea, verily, quoth I, Why hot? I think nothing impossible; for whatsoever the fates have appointed to men, that I believe shall happen. For many things chance unto me, and unto you, and to divers others, wonderful and almost (unheard of, which being declared unto the ignorant be accounted as lies. But verily I give credit unto his tale, and render entire thanks unto him in that (by the pleasant relation of this pretty tale) he hath pistracted us so that I have quickly passed and shortened this long and weariful journey, and I think that my horse also was delighted with the same, and fie brought me to the gate of this city without any pain at all, not so much by his back, as by mine own ears.
Thus ended both our talk and our journey, for they two turned on the left hand to the next village, and I rode up to the first inn that I saw, and I espied an old woman, of whom I enquired whether that city was called Hypata or no, who answered: Yes. Then I demanded whether she knew one Milo, one of the first men of the city, whereat she laughed, and said: Verily it is not without cause that Milo is accounted first in the city, for he dwells altogether without the boundary. To whom I said again: I pray thee, good mother, do not mock, but tell me what manner of man he is, and where he dwelleth. Marry, quoth she, Do not you see those bay windows, which on the one side look out upon the city, and the doors on the other side to the next lane: there Milo dwells, very rich both in money and substance, but by reason of his great avarice and covetousness he is evil spoken of, and he is a man that liveth all by usury, and lending his money upon pledges of silver and gold. Moreover he dwelleth in a small house and is ever counting his money, and hath a wife that is a companion of his extreme misery, neither kecpeth he any more in his house than one only maid, and he goes apparelled like unto a beggar.
Which when I heard I laughed with myself and thought: In faith, my friend Demeas hath served me well and with forethought, which hath sent me, being a stranger, unto such a man, in whose house I shall not be troubled either with smoke or with the scent of meat, and therewithal I rode to the door, which was fast barred, and knocked aloud and cried. Then there came forth a maid which said: Ho, sirrah, that knock so fast, in what kind of sort will you borrow money; know you not that we use to take no pledge unless it be either gold or silver? To whom I answered: I pray thee, maid, speak more gently, and tell me whether thy master be within or no. Yes, quoth she, That he is; why do you ask? Marry, said I, I am come from Corinth, and have brought him letters from Demeas his friend. Then said the maid: I pray you tarry here till I tell him so, and therewithal she closed the doors and went in, and after a while she returned again, and said: My master desireth you to come in; and so I did, where I found him sitting upon a very little bed, just going to supper, and his wife sat at his feet, but there was no meat upon the table; and, pointing at it, Behold, said he, Your entertainment. Well, quoth I, and straightway delivered to him the letters which I brought from Demeas: which when he had quickly read, he said: Verily, I thank my friend Demeas very much, in that he hath sent me so worthy a guest as you are: and therewithal he commanded his wife to sit away, and bade me sit in her place, and when I was about refusing by reason of courtesy, he pulled me by the garment and willed me to sit down. For we have, quoth he, No other stool here, nor other great store of household stuff for fear of robbing.
Then I (according to his commandment) sat down: and he fell into communication with me, and said: Verily I conjecture (and rightly) by the comely feature of your body, and by the maidenly shame-fastness of your face, that you are a gentleman born, as my friend Demeas hath no less declared the same in his letters: wherefore I pray you, take in good part our poor lodgings, and behold, yonder chamber hard by is at your commandment, use it as your own; then you shall both magnify our house by your deigning and shall gain to yourself good report, if, being contented with a humble lodging, you shall resemble and follow the virtuous qualities of your good father's namesake Theseus, who disdained not the slender and poor cottage of old Hecale. And then he called his maid, which was named Fotis, and said: Carry this gentleman's packet into the chamber and lay it up safely, and bring quickly from the cupboard oil to anoint him, and a towel to rub him, and other things necessary; and then bring my guest to the nearest baths, for I know he is very weary of so long and difficult travel. These things when I heard, I partly perceived the manners and parsimony of Milo, and (endeavouring to bring myself further in his favour) I said: Sir, there is no need of any of these things, for they are everywhere my companions by the way; and easily I shall enquire my way unto the baths, but my chief care is that my horse be well looked to, for he brought me hither roundly, and therefore, I pray thee, Fotis, take this money and buy some hay and oats for him.
When this was done and all my things brought into the chamber, I walked towards the baths, but first I went to the provision market to buy some victuals for my supper, whereas I saw great plenty of fish set out to be sold, and so I cheapened part thereof, and that which they first held at an hundred pieces, I bought at length for twenty pence: which when I had done and was departing away, Pythias, one of mine old companions and fellow at Athens, fortuned to pass by, and viewing me a good space, in the end brought me kindly to his remembrance, and gently came and kissed me, saying: O my dear friend Lucius, it is a great while past since Ave two saw each other, and moreover, from the time that Ave departed from our master Vestius I never heard any news of you; I pray you, Lucius, tell me the cause of your peregrination hither. Then I answered and said: I will make relation thereof unto you tomorrow: but what is this? Verily I think that you have obtained your own desire, whereof I am right glad. For I see these servitors that follow you, and these rods or verges which they bear: and this habit which you wear, like unto a magistrate. Then answered Pythias: I bear the office and rule of the clerk of the market, and therefore if you will aught for your supper, speak and I will purvey it for you. Then I thanked him heartily and said I had bought fish sufficient already for my dinned, but Pythias, when he espied my basket, took it and shook it, so that the fish might come to view, and demanded of me what I paid for all my sprats. In faith, quoth I, I could scarce enforce the fishmonger to sell them for twenty pence; which when he heard, he seized my hand and brought me back again into the market, and enquired of me of whom I had bought such wretched stuff. I shewed him the old man which sat in a corner, whom straightway (by reason of his office) he did greatly blame, and said: Is it thus that you serve and handle strangers? And especially our friends? Wherefore sell you this fish so dear which is not worth a halfpenny? Now perceive I well that you are an occasion to make this place, which is the flower of all Thessaly, to be forsaken of all men and reduce it into an uninhabitable rock, by reason of your excessive prices of victuals; but assure yourself that you shall not escape without punish- ment, and you shall know what mine office is, and how I ought to punish such as do offend. Then he took my basket and cast the fish on the ground, and commanded one of his servants to tread them all under his feet; so doing was Pythias well pleased with the severity he shewed in his office, and bade me farewell, and said that he was content with the shame and reproach done unto the old caitiff. So I went away, all amazed and astonished, towards the baths, considering with myself, and devising of the strong hand of that so prudent companion of mine, Pythias, whereby I had lost both my money and my meat: and there, when I had washed and refreshed my body, I returned again to Milo's house, and so got into my chamber.
Then came Fotis immediately unto me, and said that her master desired me to come to supper, but 1 (not ignorant of Milo's abstinence) prayed courteously that I might be pardoned, since I thought best to ease my weary bones rather with sleep and quietness than with meat. When Fotis had told this unto Milo, he came himself and took me by the hand to draw me gently with him, and while I did hold back and modestly excuse me, I will not, quoth he, Depart from this place until such time as you shall go with me, and to confirm the same he bound his words with an oath, whereby with insistence he enforced me all against my will to follow him and he brought me into his chamber, where he sat me down upon the bed, and demanded of me how his friend Demeas did, his wife, his children, and all his family; and I made him answer to every question; and specially he enquired the causes of my peregrination and travel; which when I had declared, he yet busily enquired of the state of my country, and the chief citizens, and principally of our Lieutenant and Viceroy. And when he perceived that I was not only wearied by my hard travel but also with talk, and that I fell asleep in the midst of my tale, and further that I spake nothing directly or advisably, but babbled only in imperfect words, he suffered me to depart to my chamber. So escaped I at length from the prattling and hungry supper of this rank old man, and being heavy with sleep and not with meat (as having supped only with talk) I returned unto my chamber and there betook me to my quiet and long desired rest.