Chapter 3

(Enter STRABAX.) STRABAX: (to himself.) One morning a short time since my father ordered me to go hence, to deal out the mast for food for the oxen. After I got there a person arrived at the farmhouse (so it pleased the Gods), who was owing money to my father, who had formerly purchased some Tarentine sheep of my father;

he asked for my father; I said he was in the city; I enquired what he wanted with him. The fellow takes a purse from off his neck, and gives me twenty minae; with pleasure I receive them, and stow them in my purse; these bad sheep, the minae, have I brought in my purse hither to the city.

By my troth, Mars has proved very angry with my father; for his sheep are not very far away from the wolves. Now, with this one stroke shall I send adrift those finical town gallants, and be bundling them all out of doors.

My father, in the first place, I’m quite resolved to ruin, root and branch; then next in turn, my mother. Now to-day I’ll carry this money to her whom I love more than my own mother. (Goes towards the door of PHRONESIUM, and knocks.) Hillo there—is any one here? There’s not a woman. Is any one going to open this door? (opens the door.)

ASTAPHIUM: Why so a stranger, pray, my dear Strabax?

Why don’t you come in at once?

Ought you to have been doing so, you, indeed, who are so intimate?

STRABAX: I’ll go in then, that you mayn’t think I’m loitering. (Goes into the house.)

ASTAPHIUM: You act obligingly.

(Enter STRATILAX.) STRATILAX: (to himself.) It seems marvellous to me, that Strabax, my master’s son, hasn’t returned from the country, unless perchance he has slily slipt in here into this den of corruption of his.

ASTAPHIUM: (aside.) Now, faith, he’ll be roaring at me if he espies me.

STRATILAX: I’m much less savage now, Astaphium, than I was before; I’m not churlish now; don’t thee fear. (She runs to a distance.) What wouldst thee be at? What?

ASTAPHIUM: What, say you? Why, I’m waiting for your churlishness.

STRATILAX: Say, command me what thee dost please, and in what way thee dost please. I’ve got all my manners anew: my old ones I’ve parted with. I can e’en fall in love, or take a mistress now.

ASTAPHIUM: Upon my faith, you do tell me fine news. But tell me, have you—?

STRATILAX: A mistress, perhaps, thee means.

ASTAPHIUM: You’ve understood nicely what I meant to say.

STRATILAX: Hark you, since I’ve been so many times backwards and forwards to the city, I’ve become quite a chatterer; I’m now a right good stalker.

ASTAPHIUM: Prithee, what’s that? That’s nonsense;

perhaps you intend to mean talking.

STRATILAX: Just so; it differs mighty little from stalking.

ASTAPHIUM: Prithee, do follow me in-doors, my love.

STRATILAX: (holding out some money to her.) Take this for thyself; keep it as a ledger for thee, that thee mayst give me thy company this night.

ASTAPHIUM: (taking the money.) You are the death of me, with your ledger. What kind of beast am I to say that is?

Thy don’t you say pledge?

STRATILAX: The r I make a saving of; just as the Praenestines have conia, for ciconia.

ASTAPHIUM: Prithee, do follow me.

STRATILAX: I’ll wait here a little for Strabax, till he comes from the farm.

ASTAPHIUM: Why, Strabax is at our house. He has just come from the farm.

STRATILAX: What, before he went to his own mother?

Alas, the man’s worth nought, i’ faith.

ASTAPHIUM: What now, your old habit?

STRATILAX: Well, I’ll say nought.

ASTAPHIUM: Prithee, do come indoors. Give me your hand. (Takes his hand.)

STRATILAX: Well, take it. (To the AUDIENCE.) I’m being led off into a public-house, where I shall be but poorly entertained for my money. (They go into the house of PHRONESIUM.)